Sideburns

Fear of what might become of those sideburns prompts apprehension to flash across his face as he s-l-o-w-ly eases back into the barbershop chair.

Sideburns? Balderdash! Those look like wings!

Even if you have to scroll back up to get a second look; make sure you get another look at those appendages!

Interestingly enough, experts in the field of human grooming practices have conducted studies into the self awareness of men and found that self identification is expressed in facial hair. As is evident with this barbershop customer, for some men the declaration of self identification expressed in their facial hair entails the wonders and skills of aeronautical navigation. Nothing but sincere admiration should be held for such brave expressions of one’s own identity. We applaud them and can only conclude that such expressions are socially acceptable (even if not socially advantageous), so long as their flight plans steer clear of your air space.

Speaking of which, in aircraft aerodynamics, the motion of air molecules below the surface of a wing creates upward lift; keeping an airplane aloft. This dynamic, essential in making flight plans predictably reliable, pushes wing integrity to the forefront as one of the key, crucial necessities of flight. Because of this, and for good reason, pre-flight checklists include wing clearance and wing constitution as items to be visibly inspected before the engine is fired.

As our customer settles into the back of the swivel chair, his apprehension subsides when he hears the barber bellow, “Wing clearance?” ”Check!”

All will be well. Flight plan accepted.

January 16, 2021 – by Derrick Urquhart